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Showing posts from March, 2009

The Wind Beneath My Wings

Years ago, when as a disillusioned and utterly confused teenager, I decided to junk whatever I was doing and sit for the Engineering entrance exams, everyone thought I had lost it completely. The exams were just a couple of months away, the last date for most forms was long gone, and I found Calculus more confusing than Greek and Roman mythology put together.

There was one person who made me believe I could do it. She made me do it.

When I lost someone and refused to grieve, it was a friend who forced me to cry. I do it readily for soppy movies and books, but when it really mattered, it took a friend.

When I was alone because of the crowd around me, when I was losing myself playing out the roles I was supposed to, it was a friend who made me face the woman in the mirror.

Years later, when in another of those moments I decided to quit my decently paid, on my terms kind of job, the whole world tried to convince me to look at things the rational way. (No have you lost it reactions now-every…

Time Flies. Yeah!

When I was struggling between changing diapers and feeding one kid, while getting the other one ready for school, this what all the wise old ladies around me would say.
“They grow up so fast you’ll miss these days”. Oh yeah! After years of sleepless nights and sterilizing bottles, I was all ready to miss these days like I miss my tonsils and appendix.My daughters are nine and six now. Years out of diapers, late night feeds and colic pains.Old enough for us to be friends and have meaningful mother to daughter conversations that I always thought I’d have with them. Except that the trialogues often go off the script.Conversation 1:E: Why can’t I have a mobile phone?L: You’ll get one when you are eighteen.E: By then I’ll have money to buy it on my own. Thank you very muchConversation 2:A: I am going to be a very kind mother when I grow upL: Oh! How?A: I am going to give lots of money to spend in the canteen. I am going to put a separate TV in their room, which they can watch whenever they …

Letting go

Sailing when the wind is high, riding out the king tide in a wind so strong that it snatches the rudder from your hands-yes that’s how the journey feels at times. Bringing up my two daughters, managing work and home is so like trying to stay vertical in a force nine gale-at times. 
There are spells in between when the wind becomes gentle, lifting us over the waves and carrying us over the years. But it still takes a lot of faith to lift my hands from the rudder and just float. 
I am trying to do that now. To regain a bit of my hardly existent sanity and to cruise at a slower pace. So many years of trying to control the winds from taking over my ship has done that. This blog is to share and seek support in becoming a better mother. {The best compliment I’ve had on this is from our Princess Aurora “Mamma, can you imagine, Mukul’s mother is worse than you!” Unimaginable Indeed!}

Driving in Bangalore

Kannada Bharata?
Rule No. 1: Learn FAST
That’s the first survival tip for Bangalore roads.

Rule no. 2: Women shouldn’t be at the wheel. No, don’t try to educate the auto wala, the call center cabs, or the sleekly oiled gentlemen in the Skoda. Even the cops have the same attitude. Save your breath.

Rule no. 3: You are from “The North”-you are responsible for everything that’s wrong with Bangalore roads, and the culture (well that’s the subject for another post).

Rule no. 4: If like me, you are a woman, at the wheel and from North (technically I am NOT from North India-but that’s again another story!)-It’s back to Rule no 1.

While you are still at it. Parwa illa-learn the key words, and keep some telephone numbers of Kannadiga friends (preferably guys-Remember Rule no 2). You never know when you might need them.

This is from experience. I have been harassed by cops. Then there was a driver who tried to make me pay for scraping against his car when I didn’t let him overtake me. Both times, the…

The Harried Mom’s survival tips for school days

These are some lessons from life and friends that help make my mornings better. I’ll keep updating the list. Please share as many tips as you can.
Labeling socks: Yep I’ve labeled them N1, N2.. J1, J2 with embroidery thread and it has taken care of a daily 10 min hassle.
Use Ala: of all permutations and combinations, this has been the most effective in turning brown uniforms to whitish.
Buy multiple sets of uniforms: Most of us managed with two, but where every minute counts, having more sets helps you avoid a lot of stress
Same with water bottles and tiffins: A backup always helps. Especially on the days when the maid doesn’t turn up and you are already so late
Back up maid: This is too much of a luxury, but there is nothing like having two maids, so that atleast one is available when you need her the most.
Making the kids do chores: They don’t get to watch TV unless next day’s bags and uniforms are in order. (I know this is worse than a boot camp, but then..)
Keeping their hair short: This…